Fat cat CC lies on the floor all day, rarely seen to move from one spot to the other. Suddenly, she digs her nails into the scratching post and pulls her body across the floor.
Brother,
“That’s the most exercise she gets all year.”
Klez-Mom,
“You talkin’ about me again?”
Tags: Cat, HOH, Weight issues
After Klez-Mom took a tumble and broke a couple of toes, she was given a prescription for painkillers.
On the phone with a friend,
“I could make loads of money for sure. Refill my prescription and sell it for cash on the streets…”
Tags: WTF
Klez-Mom, calling upstairs to dad after I agreed to help explain social media to her,
“George! A’s gonna give us a tutorial on twitty twitty this weekend!”
Tags: Old People, WTF
Continued…
1) Dad, biting into a rice cake,
“This is just like cat food.”
Pauses, takes another bite,
“It’s good.”
2) Sitting on the couch with his favourite, rubbing her furry ass and tail up against him, as she does, dad speaks. You have to understand, dad has a language of his own, frequently replacing words or peoples’ names with whatever seems to slip off his tongue. We understand. Usually.
Gesturing with his hand the act of massaging her back,
“She wants to do the thingy with me.”
Dad’s mostly known around here for his quiet and tender affection for our two cats. CoCo, dad’s favourite child, and Cashew, my beautiful furry friend. Cash enjoys spending his days cross-pawed and some peculiar habits. When he sees or hears someone headed towards the main floor bathroom, he breaks into a run, down the hall, in a panic to get in the bathroom for some one-on-one time before the door closes.
Dad’s always looking out for his kids. All of them.
Dad, to my brother, upon seeing him walk down the hall towards the bathroom,
“HEY, are you gonna go sit on the toilet with your son?”
Nothing like a good game of scrabble to wrap up a warm summer eve. It usually starts with Klez-Mom gently purring up against my arm, sweetly beckoning for some good mommy and me (and dad and anyone else who will participate) family fun time. However, once the game begins, Klez-Mom’s motivations very rapidly become clear. She’s in it to win it. And she’ll kill for it, too.
Klez-Mom,
“Is Eggo a dictionary word?”
All, unanimously,
“No.”
Klez-Mom, the proud mom that she is, smiling to herself,
“Assholes.”
Orin Zebest (flickr cc)
As many of you who visit here know, Klez-Mom is known best for her frustrating inability to hear and then re-interpret words that come out of one’s mouth. It’s utterly frustrating. But insanely hilarious, mostly for Klez-Mom herself. A few more recent cases of the daily occurrences:
The TV on an entertainment channel,
“And they’ll be amongst stars…”
Klez-Mom,
“What?! Did they just say Beyonce stars?!”
Laughs at herself, realizing what we’ve known all along,
“Could be anything I think of, couldn’t it?”
—————-
Dad, to me,
“Can you set up another fruit fly trap please?”
Klez-Mom, fixated on the food aspect of things….
“But they are SO delicious!”
—————
Sister,
“She’s kind of special. She likes the finer things.”
Klez-Mom,
“She likes stuff in it?!”
…Ya. That one stumped me too.
Tags: HOH, Weekly What, WTF
